Mindless Dreaming
by Breese
Summary: Bella was Edward's mistress, until the day that she couldn't take being the other woman anymore. The problem was that neither her, nor Edward knew that they would have all the reasons to make things right again one day.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, so... It's my first time writing in english, and this story has been in my mind for a long time. I hope you like it, and yes, I would love a Beta.**

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 **MINDLESS DREAMING**

 **PROLOGUE**

"Oh" I groaned "Yah".

"I love having you in the mornings, it's the best way of starting my days." Edward said as felt his cock slide into me hard and good, just like I liked.

"I love having you any second of my day" I said sincere. I loved Edward, he just didn't know that.

"That is good to know, I will keep that in mind" He said.

"Fuck Edward, fuck harder" I said, and just like always, he did just as I asked.

We moaned together and I worked very hard not to yell, my neighbors didn't need to hear us.

"That's good" I said when I felt Edward going deeper. I kissed his neck before gently biting the same spot. Edward loved when I did that.

"Love, I am coming. Please, come first" Edward said almost out of breath.

"Yah, I am coming too" I said.

"Yah?" He asked before kissing my neck and going deeper. That was all that I needed before feeling like exploding.

I felt Edward Cumming inside of me almost at the same time I came.

We stayed glued in one another for almost five minutes before Edward got out of me. He pulled me against his body and we kissed.

"I don't want to get out of here" I murmured against his neck, feeling the warmth of his body embrace me.

"You can stay." He said kissing my forehead before removing his arms around me " I am the one who is supposed to go."

"Edward…" I said seeing him get out of my bed.

"I have to go, honey. Jasper and Carlisle already called me more than I want to know. I am already late." He said looking at his phone as he walked into my bathroom "Can you make me something to eat? I won't have time to stop for a breakfast before the big event today, and I am going to miss you cooking skills the next few weeks that I will be away from you."

He said no more as he closed the door and left me alone in my bedroom.

I buffed as I turned to my side of the bed to get my phone. When the screen lighted up I saw that it was already eight o'clock in the morning, and the date said it was November 7th, the date I've been dreading for the last year.

I buffed when I noticed that I had three missed calls from my best friend from home, Rosalie. I ignored it and left my phone on my bed as I got up and got Edward's white shirt and put it on me.

I made him his breakfast, not knowing when that would ever happen again. I prepared waffles and blueberry pancakes to eat his cinnamon flavored cappuccino. I was the only person who knew that he liked it, and it made me feel kind of special.

As I prepared the food that I really didn't feel like eating, I came to think of how I got that special point of my life.

It all started when I left my father's house to come live here in Chicago where I studied Media Production with a minor in English Literature, I wanted to be a book editor. When I went out to the real world, the only job I found was an assistant of journalism at the . the company the hugest thing in the world, and it paid very well, so I gave up of my dream of being a book editor for awhile and accepted the job of editing official texts for the company and working on the public relations of the .

I had being working there for three months when my boss called me in a favor. She was sick, like with a super cold, and she had an exclusive interview Edward Cullen, the CEO and owner of two quarters of the company. At the age of thirty one, he was like the biggest case of success in the world.

I was super nervous as I went up to his floor. I was almost fainting when I got to his office, but one there I relaxed instantly. His piercing green eyes stared into my brown one, and the white pearl smirk that appeared in his face made me feel something totally different from fear of doing something wrong.

He answered all of the questions I made, laughed at some actually, and even told me things that I wasn't expecting. He told me how losing his parents at a plane accident two years before made him almost give everything up, and how his long term girlfriend helped him through that.

I knew right there that Edward Cullen loved his girlfriend, Irina Denali. Actually, at that same interview he reveled to me that they've got engaged two weeks before, and their wedding was being planned to happen in one year.

When I turned off the tape recorder I was using, he put his hand on my thigh and told me I was beautiful and kissed me. I lost my ability of thinking for three seconds before pushing him off me.

And that is when I became Edward Cullen's mistress or other girl as I liked to think. He came to my apartment that night to apologize and confessed to me that he had seen me around the company building and just couldn't take me out of his head. That night he kissed me, and when he came to my apartment again the next day, he said that he wanted so much more with me. He made it clear that he loved Irina and would never leave her because of me or any other woman, but was liking me and wanted to see what came out of it.

No one knew about our relationship, excepted my best friend from home, Rosalie. And she was also the only person who knew that I had fallen in love with Edward in the course of relationship. Not even him knew about it.

I sighted, remembering that today he was going to become a married man. I hated to think of it, and I knew that from now on our meetings would be lessened, at least for a while. But the problem was that I didn't like the idea of sharing him at all.

"What are you thinking?" Edward's voice brought me out of my thoughts. The pancakes were read and so were waffles and his cappuccino. Everything was laying on my marble island on the kitchen.

"How I hate today." I said sincerely.

He smiled. I took a look at his naked torso, he was wearing only his pants since I had his shirt.

"Stop the drama honey. I will be back here in three weeks, all tanned for you." He answered. His honeymoon was going to happen in Brazil.

"Yah, I like you the way you are right now" I said "Do you want more cream?" I asked to change the subject. When he shook his head no, I sat across from him and watched him eating.

"Won't you eat?" He asked. I shook my head no, my stomach was in knots and the thought of eating made me want to throw up.

We didn't talk as at. I just watched him. My heart broke at the thought that Irina would have him every morning of her life.

"I don't know how I am going to live three weeks away from your cooking skills, love." He said as he was satisfied.

"I could prepare your breakfast every morning, all you would have to do was stay here with me forever. I can make a hell of a lasagna for us tonight." I said smiling to him.

"Bella, please. You know that Irina will always come first, stop acting as stupid school girl who is having an affair with a married teacher. Irina will be my wife and I love her. You are my girl, and I do love you…"

"Just not that way, yah, I know." I said getting up from my stool and walking out of my kitchen going to my bedroom. On the way I took off his shirt.

"Irina is pregnant" Edward said out of nowhere as he came after me "We are going to announce it tonight.

That took me by surprise. I never thought about him becoming a father before.

"How far along is she?" I asked not turning to face him.

"Nine weeks" He said "I am kind happy with that, actually."

"When did you find out?"

"She told me two days ago"

"And how does it affect our relationship?" I asked finely turning to face him. That information changed a lot of things on my mind. One thing was cheat on his wife, other was cheat on a family with kids and all. I knew it because my parents divorced when my father found out that my mom was having an affair.

"I won't lie to you, at first I thought of ending things with you, but I know I won't be able to. I grew accustomed to having you in my life, and that is not something I want to give up. I know it is going to be hard at first, but I know we can find a way." He said, and just than his phone started to ring.

"I think it's time for you to go." I said, not knowing what to think.

"Are you okay?" He asked ignoring his phone as he came to take me in his arms.

"I don't know."

"Bella…"

"Go Edward, it's your wedding day and I am sure you have a lot to do."

"Bella..." He started, but I kissed him on the lips so he would stop.

"I am going to take a shower. I do have a lot of things to do. Have a great wedding or whatever." I said getting out of his arms and locking myself on my bathroom. I heard him moving in my bedroom and talking on his phone, only when I knew that he was gone I started crying, crying because I wasn't the woman wearing a white dress that day, crying because I wasn't the woman who was going to be the mother of his child. Crying because deep down I knew that I couldn't keep doing what we were doing.

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 **So, what do you think?**


	2. Leaving

**MINDLESS DREAMING**

 **CHAPTER 1 – LEAVING**

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It has been three weeks since the last time I saw Edward in person. I say in person because there has been like a hundred new photographs of him enjoying his honeymoon with Irina, and being the important person that he is, the tabloids are crazy trying to live off his new married status. A lot has changed in the past three weeks, and I feel like going crazy because of it.

I was really mad at him for the first three days after he left my apartment, I cried and cried like a baby until Rosalie called me and me think things over. I loved Edward and that is something I couldn't control, but deep down I knew that I couldn't let him run over me and do as he pleased, and because of that I made a decision, something that I never thought I'd be doing, but now it was as real as anything in my life.

Last week I gave Giulia, my immediate boss, my resection letter. I quitted my job and talked with the owner of my apartment. He was going to keep my furniture as payment of my last rent. I am moving back home, where my friends and family were waiting for me. I did even have a temporary job as a librarian at the Forks High School, I would work there until the end of the next semester, but Rose was in contact with a friend from Seattle who worked at a publisher company and was looking for a job for me.

So today, Friday, November 27th, my last day working for the .

Edward didn't know about it, actually, I haven't accepted any of his phone calls or texted him back since the last time we saw each other, and that was actually helping me go through my decision to leave.

"Hey Bella, how are you?" James Lancer approached me as I served myself at the company's restaurant. My plate was full of green salad and a piece of baked chicken, I've been feeling off for the last few days and eating had become a torture for me, I've been throwing up everything I ate since last week, and I didn't want to think what that could mean.

"Fine" I said as always " What about you? I've heard about the contract you've got with the Manstric guys, that is good." I said looking at him. With my plate made, I waited for him before going to pay for my food.

"That is a big, I am really happy, I am even throwing a party at my place tonight, want to come?" He asked. He started moving to pay for his food, so I went with him.

"I can't, my flight is scheduled for 5 am, I am going to live with my father for awhile." I said. A few people around here knew that I was leaving.

"Already? I've heard about you leaving, but I didn't know you were actually leaving the state and all." He said.

We paid for our food as I explained to him a fake reason to leave. We sat together and actually had a nice conversation at lunch. James worked at the marketing team and we rarely met at lunch and the elevator. We had gone out once before I started seeing Edward, but nothing happened besides a kiss.

We were just talking when I saw Edward enter the restaurant. At first he didn't see me, too focused in a conversation with his best friend, Jasper Whitlock. James didn't notice how my body reacted to Edward's presence, catching my left hand in his to get my attention.

"I think you should totally go to my party tonight, I even promise to let you leave early." James said looking into my eyes. He was handsome, but the only man that could get my attraction was Edward.

"I will think about it, I promise" I said, but the idea of going out tonight was completely out of possibility for me. "I have to go now, James. I do have a lot of things to arrange here too. Maybe I will see you tonight"

I didn't look back at Edward's direction as got out of the restaurant, but did feel my phone buzzing in my hand alerting of a new message that I knew was from him.

 **…**

I got to my apartment at midnight. My co-workers made me go out with them and they gave me all the kinds of drinks that I could have. I didn't drink enough to get real drunk, but at some point I saw double. Thank goodness William didn't drink and got everybody at their own house. I had some trouble getting to my second floor apartment and getting the key in the right hole.

My living room was as normal as it could be. I had my sofa there, but the TV, books and everything personal were in boxes being shipped in a truck to Forks, I have dispatched my things two days ago and now I only had two suitcases to worry about.

I bypassed my kitchen and went straight to my bedroom, feeling like a shower was needed before going to bed.

But then all of my plans changed when I opened the door of my bedroom and saw Edward sitting on my bed as my two suitcases were by his side.

"Are you moving?" He asked me looking into my eyes. All of the alcohol I drank suddenly disappeared from my system, I was sober as ever.

"Yes" I answered not lying.

"Bella, what is going on?" He shouted at me, not yelling, but I could feel the desperation in his voice. I think part of him already knew that I wasn't just moving out of my apartment.

"Today was my last day at " I started seeing the color vanish from his face "I am moving back to Forks."

"What?" He shouted loud, making me take a step back as he got up from my bed " What happened? Why are you leaving me?"

"I can't keep doing this Edward. I can't be near you anymore. This relationship is not what I want for my life." I said getting close to him " I love you too much to keep doing this."

"You can't leave me, Bella" He said after taking a whole minute of silence. He calmed down a little as he approached me. I felt his hand touching my face and all of my body melted at his warmth. "I love you too much to let you go."

"But you love your wife more" I said, remembering her.

"It's different. What I feel for both you…"

"But she is more important, and I won't put you in the position of choosing one of us because I already know which one you will pick. Please, don't make things harder than they already are."

"And by leaving you are making things better?" He asked.

"For both of us. I don't want to be the other woman forever. I want to have a normal romance, get married and have children. You are not going to make any of that a reality for me, and I do deserve it, even if I have to learn to love someone else."

He took a deep breath , turning away from me.

"I think you should leave. I have a headache and my day will start early." I said when he said nothing.

But instead of bypassing me to get to the door, Edward turned and in one movement was holding me by my waist with only one hand while the other caressed my face. I looked into his deep green eyes, something I shouldn't have done, because for the first time I saw pain in his face.

"Don't leave, please." He begged, I felt his lips touching mine. His mint breath was as delicious as ever. His hand went through my shirt, slowly pulling it up.

"Edward…" I started, but he took that as an opportunity to shove his tongue in my month, I couldn't resist and no kiss him back. Somehow he took my off my shirt, his hands were all over my body, my nipples were erect because of him, and I was already anticipating what was about to happen.

I knew we couldn't be doing this, we shouldn't.

"I love you Bella. I am sorry that I can't give you all of me, but please, let me make things work" He begged before taking off my skirt. I was only in my pants and bra.

"I love you too, Edward…" I said, not knowing what to say. He drove me crazy in love with his touches and in moments like this thinking didn't work well for me.

"That is enough, love." He took off my bra, and I didn't hesitate before taking his shirt out of our way. I don't really know how, but we've got naked in my bed and he was over me. "I can't live without you, Bella. You have no idea how awful these last weeks were for me. I missed you so much love, please, don't make me go through that again. Don't leave me."

I didn't answer him, if I really was doing what I was doing, I wanted one last time with him just have as a special moment in my memory.

"Make love to me, Edward" I asked before kissing him.

 **…**

I woke up as my alarm went off, I quickly silenced it before taking in my surrounds.

I felt Edward's body pressed against mine, his arm wrapped around my waist and chest, holding me tight like trying to stop me from get out of his grip.

I sighted, I knew I had no time to waist, my flight was taking off at 5 o'clock and it was 3 am already. Luckily Edward didn't wake up easily, so I did have as a vantage.

I loosened his grip on me and slipped out of my bed and went quietly to my bedroom. I tried to make almost no noise as I took my shower and then put on some clothes. Thank I had everything ready.

I closed my suitcases and carried one by one to my living room. When I was ready to live, I went back to my bedroom and gave Edward one last kiss, leaving him one message on his phone as goodbye.

Before leaving my apartment, I put my cell phone right beside his, I didn't want to take anything that could keep me in contact with Edward.

 **….**

THREE WEEKS LATER

I try very hard to believe that there must be a reason to anything and keep a smile on my face as often as possible. I am the kind of person who will always say that everything is okay, even thought I am dying inside, the kind one that will always see a good sign at everything.

Leaving Edward was harder than I thought. Getting into the plane and actually leaving him behind hurt more than I believed it was possible. The whole way home I thought I thousand times of going back and beg him to take me again. More than once I regretted my decision of going back to Forks.

But when I first saw my father and Rosalie waiting for me in the airport I knew I had made the right decision. I knew that even thought I was hurting inside, I still had people that really loved me and would actually make everything in their power to make me happy.

I started my new job and settled in a new routine of living with my father. The hardest part was imposing a healthy diet at our house, my father was the kind of man who lived eating pizza and hamburger. He didn't like the changes I made in our menu.

I actually liked my new life. Alice Brandon, Rosalie's friend who worked at a publisher company, had scored me a job interview the week before, and just two days ago I got an email telling that the Imaginpaper was contracting me as a new book editor and I was really excited, the thing is that I had to move to Seattle, but Rosalie and her husband, Emmett lived there, so I would at least have my best friend with me, and would be just four hours away from my dad.

I was really happy, starting to learn to live my life without Edward. It was hard, but I tried to think of him as little as possible. I avoided all kinds of news related to him, and I think I was making progress.

But everything changed yesterday when I went out to the grocery store to buy a few things that were missing from our house. That is when I went to buy my shampoo and realized that hadn't buy any tampons for awhile. I gave up everything and went straight to the drugstore, buying three different texts as I replayed in my mind everything that has been different with me.

Before leaving Edward I was already feeling off, not being able to keep anything in my stomach and having a hard time at waking up and keep myself up. Since moving to Forks my eating disorder hasn't been different, and some of my clothes weren't working on my body anymore.

I got home and locked myself in the bathroom, not wanting to waste my time.

As I waited for the results to come, I started to think of what I should do. If I was really pregnant, Edward would have to know, it was his right and I couldn't keep something like a child from him.

I felt like passing out until I saw what the three texts said, and then I didn't know what to do, because all three of them said the same thing, that I was expecting Edward's child.

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 _So, what did you guys think?_

 _Next chapter we will see them in the future, I think it will be Edward's POV._

 _I am going to be updating in the weekends, it is when real life let me do something._

 _Please, say what you have to say._

 _Have a nice week everyone._


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